And then it happens

So. I'm single, after 15 months of holding down a relationship I am back where I started, only this time I don't even have my two best friends there.

I need to get away so have called work and told them I'll be off all weekend and am getting the train home at 5 in the morning. I just can't stand to be inside this house anymore, it makes me so angry and just generally upset.

I have to move out, I just don't see how continuing to live here would work, but therein lies a giant problem. The logical choice would be to look at going into halls in Bolton where my university is, however I couldn't get back there from work so would have to leave my job, thus meaning I couldn't afford rent. Gah.

Right now it feels like I've lost everything, my best friends, my boyfriend, my house and worse, any self-confidence. I feel like a wreck and I need a hug so much, only problem is there's nobody left to give me one.

Hey, so once again it's been an age between posts.

Since I last posted things are better, Thom and I talked through things and it appears we are all good (phew). The glandular fever thing is still kicking my ass, but I'm putting up a good fight (which I am currently losing, more on that later), and work is... Well okay, I'm still working all the hours there are, and about to embark on the craziest working week of my life, but I'm getting on really well with everyone (well, everyone but one person, and even he can be alright).

So, a quick summary of recent events (most likely not in any kind of order): A bottle of vodka fell off the wall at work when I was pouring from it last week, getting vodka in my eyes, my mouth and showering me with broken glass, scary. Yesterday I enrolled at uni and generally explored Bolton a bit, the uni gym is a bargain, £25 for the year, all classes included. I went to Madrid for a bit with my Mum and brother, was glorious weather and an uneventful family holiday, although I did get to pet prairie dogs (Google them, they're sooo cute). I enrolled in a Spanish course starting a week tomorrow till January, should be really good, but I'm no sure the level I'm going to be put in is going to be right since I did their level test on the morning after working till 3.30am, tey said that it's easy to move classes though, so should be alright.

Today has been an experience, I've never completely lost my voice for this long before. Last night at work involved a lot of raised voicedness and this morning for some reason I awoke to find it'd copletely taken away my ability to talk, even though I feel fine in myself. The trip into town to sell my laptop to one of my friends was interesting (had to point instead of speaking when buying my bus ticket), especially when he called me in the middle of town to say he was running late and I had to whisper down the phone to him.
I went into Boots to ask the pharmacist lady if she could recommend aything to help me regain my voice, and she gave me a bottle of liquidy stuff and warned me it would not taste too great. She was not kidding. Have you ever eaten gone off pesto? Mix that taste with sour milk and it's what this throat stuff tastes like. So far I've taken it three times today and still have no voice. I'd better get it back by tomorrow as I have to phone the council (re: urgent demand give us money or we'll take you to court) and I'm not sure they'd be all that enthusiastic about attempted conversation with a mute.

Anyway, I don't actually have a lot to say apart from to apologise in advance for the lack of posting as I'm working 8-3 Wednesday and Friday, in uni Monday Tuesday and Thursday and working nights every night but Friday this week.

Take care everyone.

Okay, so I've not written in ages. The truth of the matter is that I have a relapse of glandular Fever whch has taken all of my energy, I'm working 5 and 6 nights a week in the club because I have so little money and after only two months living together, my relationship looks set to end, at best it looks like I'll be moving out and we split up, at worst, it's over. I miss my two best friends more than anything.

So sorry for the lack of updates, but I didn't think you guys needed details of all the problems going on.

Lonely

This isn't the way it's meant to be! Living with the Boy is supposed to be full of laughing and crazy sex whenever we want it, but in reality, since I started my job we've had one day together where neither of us was working and on that day I got drunk and fell asleep in the spare room, thus wasting our precious moments of free time. To make it even more irritating, the Boy is at present in Scotland. Where is it that I wanted to go home to but can't afford time off/ train tickets? Oh yes! Scotland!
Ah well, the boy is back on Saturday and I do believe that we both have Sunday off, so maybe I shall resure domestic goddess status (I admit I've not retained that title in his absence) and cook us Sunday lunch.

So, since being in Salford I have so far managed to escape altercations with the legendary chav population, although I have not managed to walk through Salford alone without being wolf whistled or beeped at. I do not believe, however (unfortunately) that this means I have become more attractive, as one of these times I was in my pyjamas with no makeup on (shuttup, I was going to the shop to buy butter for my breakfast toast).

Tuesday night was my first night out with my new work mates, a scary prospect indeed, however I braved it in an attempt to actually make some friends and I had a lot of fun although I was ridiculed for my dislike of Oasis. I do think that I may have to make an effort to drag the boy out to somewhere slightly different one night though, as I'm getting to the point that if I have to hear any more generic indie music I may just explode. Unfortunate since I am working in an indie club four nights this week and five nights next week.

Anyway, paranoia that the Boy might turn up earlier than expected and find the house in its current state means I must go and attempt to tidy up.

So, lots has happened since Iast wrote anything, whether it is of any interest to anyone other than me is another matter. I shall write it down anyway, in nothing like the correct order.

I did get the job in the club after all, so from now on, I am Nicki The Barmaid, exciting stuff. Five nights a week I will be found serving alcohol to drunken students and stumbling in at stupid o'clock. Okay, so the second part is nothing new, but it's going to be a bit of a shock to the system staying sober at those hours of the day.

Today I had an interview for another job (this time working the weekends), well, actually the interview was meant to be yesterday but I got locked inside the house all day yesterday (note to self: check your house keys work before the boy goes off to work in Nottingham). My god, you'd think I was applying for the SAS with the number of questions they asked. And what questions, they quizzed me on technical matters of outdoor pursuits (the interview was at North Face, outdoorsy type shop) and my involvement in said pursuits. Thank god for my first high school where skiing and other cold and challenging things were compulsory. Anyway, after I breathed a sigh of relief at getting through the questioning in tact, I was informed that I shall hear "shortly" whether I have reached the second interview stage... I almost died at the thought of going trough that again, but we will see if it comes to that.
It does seem a little ridiculous that if I get this second job, then between the two of us, the boy and I will have six jobs.

On the way home from the interview I got caught in a thunderstorm, it was rather exciting, and sounded like someone rolling a bowling ball around the sky, there were incredible black clouds and even a cartoon-style lightning bolt or two. Magical.

Our little house is really coming together now, all that is left to purchase are bins for the bathroom and kitchen which I believe we are buying tomorrow. I finally completed my quest for a cutlery tray for our cutlery drawer today, I never thought it would be so hard to find something so simple! We even have painted canvases hanging in the stairwell which I feel have elevated our status to true pretention.

Anyway, I'm off to unload the washing machine and wash up before the boy returns from Whereverthehellhesworkingtoday. I am a Domestic Goddess.

I've landed...

So, first full day in Salford, the chav count is surprisingly low so far (I'm almost disappointed that nobody has threatened to cut me up yet). The house is actually really nice (try as I might I could not help but imagine it would be a shit-hole). Of course no new house is complete without a few random expensive buys. Mine being a little more expensive than the norm: a shelf from Ikea (acceptable at £20) and a brand new beautiful funky and shiny imac, coming in at a not-quite-so-sensible £1200. Yes I got reeled in by the sales patter and parted with an extra £300 of my money for an extra four inches of screen. The logic that the salesman drip-fed me was that I was upgrading for the sake of the graphic design part of my course so should get the best machine for my money. This all made sense in the shiny whiteness of the shop, from the shiny white toothed salesman, however I now wonder if I maybe went a little mad. This computer is an utter beast, takes up two thirds of my desk and is a little complicated for my small brain to fathom (luckily the boy is only too happy to help out setting it up, I think he really just wants to play with the new toy). But nobody can deny that my new computer is bloody cool, even if it makes the boy swear more than normal.

I had a job interview today, one of those annoying ones where the interviewer makes all the right noises at you but gives nothing away about whether you've actually got the job. I shall find out by Friday apparently. I'd really like to get this job, and only half of the reason for that is that I can't be bothered handing out more CVs.

Anyway, off to finish unpacking and start to re-download my whole music collection onto my new computer.

God what a geek...

I have this shiny new blog and all I want to do is post in it. Don't get used to this, I usually last about two months before I lose interest and posting drops to "I hate men" days... If that.

All I have to report since my last post is that I am still sitting on the couch, but have come to the realisation that I love my furniture polish, it smells like vanilla and makes the asthma-causing dust go away. That really is it.

Anyway, since I feel like writing, I shall discuss what I have upcoming in my new life in Salford. Firstly and most importantly, I must move into a house. Not a flat, a house, this is a step up in the world (if you don't consider its location). The boy picked up a key today and promptly went out to Ikea and bought us some new furniture. I'd love to say I've trained him well, but in fact he is like this naturally. What a clever boy my boy is.
Nextly (is that a real word? It looks silly), I must find a job. Ideally I'd find one where I could express myself creatively, however I am a realist and as a student, my choices are likely to be limited to bar/ restaurant work, shop work, call centre work, or prostitution (flyering is NOT an option). Although I am reliably informed by Cosmopolitan magazine that the latter is becoming more and more popular among students, I fear that the boy may not approve, so I shall discount it. Office environments, which a call centre would inevitably be, terrify me so that option is also out, leaving just shops, restaurants or bars. As a not-very-loud Scottish girl with an accent that nobody south of the border understands, and a tendancy towards throat infections, the loud club atmosphere may not be where I am most suited, but nevertheless I have an interview on Monday for a club in Manchester, time will tell how it goes.

The final important thing (obviously not counting becoming an art student in September) is shopping. I am currently posting from a laptop held together with Blu Tac and have come to the conclusion that in spite of my negative bank balance (thanks to a not too cheap last meal out with the flatmates tonight), a brand new imac is an essential addition to my life. And naturally when you are buying one Apple product, you must buy another so it is not lonely, this second product being a shiny new 80gb ipod. I know logically that I will never fill 80gb, but the "what if...?" voice tells me that spending £50 for 50gb more space is the only way to go. Sigh. The boy does not help matters, I feel he may encourage my irrational spending habit and I will come out of this relationship with a lot less money. On the plus side I get companionship, my boy there every day and even better, sexy new gadgets.

That is all. I must sleep in order to see my last day in the flat.